This is to the Whanau Hapu and Iwi wherever and whoever we are. As I wrote last week our Whanau, Hapu and Iwi chain is a very elegant one. Trouble is, elegance doesn’t cut it anymore for heaps of us because there’s been a serious break in the chain or at least a kink in the link. The reasons are debatable but one thing’s for sure – we’re the only ones who can mend it. Not government. Not the schools and sports clubs, not the Councils, not the DHB – you and me.
Why? Because until we take personal responsibility for changing the destructive dynamic of Whanau hell-bent on repeating the same mistakes over and over, then all the service providers will do is fence the top and clean up the mess at the bottom of the cliff over which more and more of us are either falling or jumping. In the meantime, our own cultural, societal and familial values are ringing hollow for the abused, the maimed, the bereft and the dead.
We rescued the reo and now it’s time to rescue the speakers. We have to do a “Kohanga Reo” across every living generation of our Whanau and teach them how to be fabulous again. Call it “Fabulous Whanau” or some such, and staff it with skilled “Whanau Mahita“ to do the teaching. Take every prevention, intervention and postvention that already works out of the schools, off the streets and directly into every home. Aim every piece of research, on which new programmes will be built, at Whanau in our homes. Churches, marae, schools, clubs, clinics, service providers and others can support and reinforce what is done, but WE have to ensure the delivery penetrates the point of need – our Whanau in our homes.
I thank Te Oranga, Te Hauora O Te Hiku O Te Ika and the DHB for the Suicide Prevention hui held last week. I hope a follow up call will now be made for Whanau leaders and relevant professionals to mahi tahi. Together look at the solutions offered at that hui. Set up a menu of choices from which to tailor-make the approach and find the best-fit Mahita for each Whanau. Design together the peer review, supervision and reporting format thingies that will keep everyone honest and accountable. Jointly develop and make the case to the DHB or whoever for the money and materials needed. Then power up and work to penetrate our whanau.
Who are these leaders? They are the ones who have the goodies and the guts to do whatever it takes to fix the broken links of our whanau. The ones who will coax and cajole, even bully us and the agencies into doing the right thing. The ones who couldn’t give a flying fig about our rights if we’re a kaka parent or a kuare Crown agent and who, rather than let us ruin them, will take our children to either raise themselves or find a decent Whanau who will. The ones who will help us to rehabilitate but will kick our butts out the door if we stuff it up for their uri. They’re the ones who will help stop this damnable scourge of murder, suicide and abuse afflicting us.
I believe every baby comes to earth ‘trailing clouds of glory’ needing Whanau who are committed and know how to literally lift and power them into their full magnificence. Only then will the desecration and destruction stop. Oh and by the way – misery-mongers, finger pointers, mona lisas and unrepentant abusers of any race, colour or creed need not apply.
Hei konei. Hei kona.
Why? Because until we take personal responsibility for changing the destructive dynamic of Whanau hell-bent on repeating the same mistakes over and over, then all the service providers will do is fence the top and clean up the mess at the bottom of the cliff over which more and more of us are either falling or jumping. In the meantime, our own cultural, societal and familial values are ringing hollow for the abused, the maimed, the bereft and the dead.
We rescued the reo and now it’s time to rescue the speakers. We have to do a “Kohanga Reo” across every living generation of our Whanau and teach them how to be fabulous again. Call it “Fabulous Whanau” or some such, and staff it with skilled “Whanau Mahita“ to do the teaching. Take every prevention, intervention and postvention that already works out of the schools, off the streets and directly into every home. Aim every piece of research, on which new programmes will be built, at Whanau in our homes. Churches, marae, schools, clubs, clinics, service providers and others can support and reinforce what is done, but WE have to ensure the delivery penetrates the point of need – our Whanau in our homes.
I thank Te Oranga, Te Hauora O Te Hiku O Te Ika and the DHB for the Suicide Prevention hui held last week. I hope a follow up call will now be made for Whanau leaders and relevant professionals to mahi tahi. Together look at the solutions offered at that hui. Set up a menu of choices from which to tailor-make the approach and find the best-fit Mahita for each Whanau. Design together the peer review, supervision and reporting format thingies that will keep everyone honest and accountable. Jointly develop and make the case to the DHB or whoever for the money and materials needed. Then power up and work to penetrate our whanau.
Who are these leaders? They are the ones who have the goodies and the guts to do whatever it takes to fix the broken links of our whanau. The ones who will coax and cajole, even bully us and the agencies into doing the right thing. The ones who couldn’t give a flying fig about our rights if we’re a kaka parent or a kuare Crown agent and who, rather than let us ruin them, will take our children to either raise themselves or find a decent Whanau who will. The ones who will help us to rehabilitate but will kick our butts out the door if we stuff it up for their uri. They’re the ones who will help stop this damnable scourge of murder, suicide and abuse afflicting us.
I believe every baby comes to earth ‘trailing clouds of glory’ needing Whanau who are committed and know how to literally lift and power them into their full magnificence. Only then will the desecration and destruction stop. Oh and by the way – misery-mongers, finger pointers, mona lisas and unrepentant abusers of any race, colour or creed need not apply.
Hei konei. Hei kona.
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